DraftKings NFL: Week 11 Declarations

tom-brady-and-rob-gronkowski

DraftKings NFL or bumble? Why not both I say! The practice of finding your soul mate using a dating app is very much like setting a lineup in GPPs. It starts with immense positivity and hope. You spend all week researching trying sift through all the different combinations that could be “the one”. You tell yourself to stay open minded, and be persistent. Then, you meet in person for the first time and realize Melvin Gordon’s profile pictures are from five years and 50 pounds ago. At first, you say to yourself, “be polite, have one drink, and make something up”. As you find yourself ordering a second drink you start rationalizing, “okay, so he used old pictures–what’s the big deal, he is really easy to talk to, and he does have five catches“. After finishing your third drink, you just accept it–“eh…I’ve done worse”. The regret and shame subsides after a few days and… the swiping commences! Ok, so it’s more like after a few hours but you get the idea. The minute I realized my love affair with Gordon last week wasn’t meant to be, my mind immediately began hatching the master plan for becoming a millionaire in week 11. As for dating, well…

Week 10 Recap

If not becoming a millionaire is a bad first date, not cashing in any lineups is like discovering your significant other’s bumble profile on your friend’s phone. Luckily besides Gordon, things went well enough for me to cash in six of seven GPP lineups highlighted by Sterling Shepard’s huge 11 catch day. But back to that whole finding out your girlfriend is on bumble thing… how has this not been the basis for a movie plot yet? I think I would take the rom-com approach where the boyfriend attempts to catfish her for revenge with a fake profile. But when he confronts her he inadvertently discovers she’s dealing with sex addiction. They end up working through the issue together, grow closer, and fall in love all over again. Or, go with a thriller where he takes his revenge by setting a murderous death trap that kills her slowly while she’s forced to watch him deleting her bumble matches ONE… BY… ONE! Either way, I’d watch.

IMG_1953

Projected Pats Stacks

Back in my week two write up I sensed a Patriots orgy was on the horizon after getting embarrassed at home against the Chiefs in their opener. They rewarded me nicely with over 500 yards of offense, and four offensive touchdowns in a performance that is aging very well as the Saints defense is proving to be a strength this season. Now, in week 11, TB12 and pals head to Mexico City matched-up against a Raiders defense that yields the highest opposing quarterback rating in the NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE. Of course, Brady will have his all-pro Spanish speaking tight end with him who, by the way, hasn’t gone back-back weeks without scoring a touchdown all season and just happened to miss out on the end zone last week. It’s worth noting that girls I’ve come across when swiping who have normal names with non-traditional spellings such Cydnee or Kaytlynn, tend to offer higher upside in other non-traditional ways as well. That’s why I’m really into Brandin Cooks scoring on a reverse this week.

Position Player Salary
QB Tom Brady  $      7,400
RB Jordan Howard  $      6,200
RB Dion Lewis/James White  $      4,200/4,700
WR Keelan Cole  $      3,800
WR Brandin Cooks  $      6,600
WR Amari Cooper/Michael Crabtree  $      6,000/5,900
TE Rob Gronkowski  $      7,200
FLEX Kenyan Drake/Jamison Crowder/Theo Riddick  $      4,800/4,300/4,100
DST Chargers  $      3,000
When bumble profile has no full body pics...

When bumble profile has no full body pics…

Position Player Salary
QB Tom Brady  $      7,400
RB Jordan Howard  $      6,200
RB Rex Burkhead  $      4,200
WR Jamison Crowder  $      4,300
WR Brandin Cooks  $      6,600
WR Amari Cooper  $      6,000
TE Rob Gronkowski  $      7,200
FLEX Chris Thompson/Marvin Jones/Jordan Reed  $      5,400/5,600/5,000
DST Chargers  $      3,000

Speaking of which, I have a bumble date Friday night. Over/under on how many drinks it lasts–1.5. Over/under on drinks before the date–2.5. One characteristic I find attractive in women and athletes is irrational confidence. Jags rookie receiver Dede Westbrook has plenty entering what should be his debut this week where the Jacksonville receiving corp is banged up, making someone like Westbrook an intriguing candidate as this week’s version of Kenny Golladay week one. I like both him and Keelan Cole, who I wrote about last week, as low percentage owned/sneaky upside guys this week. And yes, I know Blake Bortles is the quarterback for Jacksonville.

Before we move on from awful quarterbacks, I’d like to point out the Joey Bosa and Melvin Ingram pass rush will be going against 5th round rookie Nathan Peterman making his first career start. I’m convinced one of these weeks that duo is going to cause two defensive touchdowns, and this Sunday seems like a great spot for my beliefs to come to fruition. Raider receivers Amari Cooper and Michael Crabtree are fantastically priced high floor/big upside potential selections going against a Pats defense that’s given up the second most yards and catches to wide receivers in the NFL this season. This contest also projects to be the highest scoring game in week 11, which is why I will likely be going heavy Pats in a majority of my lineups anticipating a minimum four offensive touchdowns. I’ll also be making an effort to get Jordan Howard in most lineups who appears to be in a nice bounce back position against a Lions run defense that was gashed by an average Browns running attack allowing over 5.5 yards per running back carry last week.

Photo: Maddie Meyer/Getty Images "You're Schmoopie. No you're Schmoopie"

Photo: Maddie Meyer/Getty Images
“You’re Schmoopie. No, you’re Schmoopie

Week 11 Picks

The lone loss last week came in the college ranks where me, and the rest of the world, got absolutely vegased watching Michigan St. dive head first into a buzz saw in Columbus last Saturday afternoon. Sunday made up for it with four wins in the NFL that put me at 32-18-1 on the year. That includes 13-1 over the last three weeks in the NFL! My approach of combining relevant statistical support, instinct, and irrational logic is finally paying off!

Chargers -4.5: My mom called me last Sunday morning wondering if she should start “J Thomas” or “Hunter Lac” at tight end. After some confusion, I realized I still haven’t grasped that the Chargers have relocated to Los Angeles. Does it scare me that the news of the Bills switching to a rookie 5th rounder at quarterback this week has had zero impact on this line? Kind of, but not enough.

Lions -3: I’ll continue to go with the narrative that the Lions are fake good. They will beat up on the bad teams, and lose to the good ones.

Patriots -7: Five of the Patriot’s seven wins have come by at least seven points or more. It feels kind of dirty getting them to cover anything less than double digits. Regardless, I can’t talk all that shit above and hesitate here–Pats by double digits.

Jaguars -7.5: How did I almost get through a week 11 write-up without mentioning America’s favorite Eleven from the Netflix original Stranger Things. In honor of her, 21-10 Jags. And, my boy Keelan Cole gets his first career touchdown on a duck from Bortles.

Cowboys +4.5: After seeing Dallas without all-pro left tackle Tyron Smith, and Zeke Elliott last week why would anyone take the Boys Sunday night? Same reason I continue to bumble…

RepulsiveRegalLacewing

Good Luck in week 11! And good luck to me Friday night! Don’t forget to comment, share, and follow me on twitter @realBobbyAdcock.

 

 

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>